Lunch: Japanese, very late, mid-afternoon
Dinner: Diet Rite, cheese popcorn, orange sherbet
It seems that I have given up, yes? I feel like I am still invested in this process, but the facts, and my ginormous butt, bear false witness to that. Still, I begin every day with a joyful spirit and enthusiasm to eat well, get some extra walking in there someplace and prove to myself that I am capable of making and keeping a commitment. Ending each day is much the same, enthusiasm-wise, but with the bitter knowledge of how I end up laughing in the face of my determination. Hah! Take that, Resolve! Ho, there, Steadfastness, where do you think you are going? Whoa, Tenacity, stop dilly-dallying and get everyone back on track. Why do you think we made you the leader, just so that you could sit there, stick there and wave a pom-pon once in a while?
There are too many players in this whole thing...no wonder I cannot get it all together.
I should be really upset about my lack of doggedness, but I am not. I have had one kick-ass week and I am still feeling great. I think that there is a new bone-on-bone place rubbing away in my right hip, the nerve pain has amped up a bit on my face, and someone who is not me found a new way to manifest his inner, mean, (expletive-laced) bastard, but none of this seems to make any difference. Not even the crazier than usual local folk who come to chat with me at work, and most especially the guy who came in to interview me as a potential employee of his to help him with his attempts to avoid being shut-down by the government because they do not want him to get the patents and produce the things he has invented that will save the world. It was a very interesting hour with him, I have not committed to being hired by him, declined his invitation to exchange telephone numbers and addresses and will not be going to his house to help de-bug it from the eavesdropping equipment the secret operatives have installed there, even though they taunt him by calling him on the telephone and telling him to put down his book and leave the house.
Truth be told, I think that the crazier than usual folk are my favorite kind of people. They have found me at work and at the gallery. It is never an inconvenience to have them stop by and chat away like they are making any kind of sense to be, because the whole world is not making any sense and it is my guess that those guys have a head start on the rest of us. You know that saying about how just because you are paranoid, it does not mean that they are not out to get you. Yep.
I am not a fan of Karen Kingsbury, but I accidentally watched a film made from one of her books this evening, and I like it. A lot. Like, really a lot. I wonder if I am bi-polar and in the manic phase. Really, that would explain so much.
Whatever the cause of my decent moods, bless it. And, even though it was not the best kind of choice to make for dinner, I am please by having eaten only orange food. The only thing that would have made it complete would have been an orange soda, but the diet ones taste kind of icky and the regular kind tastes kind of not so great for my blood sugar.
Whatever is going on here, it is chasing the complaining right out of me, which is always a good thing. And, I have a new Richard Laymon book to shiver my timbers tonight. I hope that there is lots of gore in my immediate future. So, on to the GP.
More hearts, I think.
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