Tuesday, May 17, 2011

100 Days toward a healthier life - Day 10

Breakfast:  2 eggs, over-easy, 1 toast, buttered
Lunch:  Stir fry, pea pods, celery, onions, mushrooms, jalapeno, pork, 1/2 pineapple, 3 strawberries, tea, pickled ginger
Dinner: Microwave popcorn, 1 cup yogurt, 1 cup frozen raspberries
Lots of water.

Well, today was the day to get back to the Weight Watchers place, which I did after mentoring and lunch.  I had called their toll-free number to get my ducks in a row, but when I got there, the two women had conflicting views on how members could make the weekly meeting fee payments, and when I factored in the wrong information that had been given to me via the telephone, well, I had filled out the forms, but could not join.

So, they let me stay (oh, bless their stoopid, little hearts, my god) for the meeting and it was pretty interesting.  The meeting leader played a game that embarrassed the volunteers, then gave only one of them a prize.  And, there is still that whole giving out the tiny star stickers.  She also passed out these little, hand-shaped clicker things that everyone was supposed to use to "applaud" for the people who had reached milestones of one kind or another.  It is the same cheer leading, get a sticker for saying the right thing or saying close to the right thing but with a whole lot of enthusiasm process.

Now, I need them more than they need me.  Frankly, they do not need me at all, but I am trying to salvage some self-respect here.  Lordy.  Anyway, I need to join this thing.  I will go to the bank on Thursday, open a checking account dedicated to paying the fees and just get over myself.  It will be a while before I can go back to a meeting because they will not accept an actual check, but need you to give them the account information via a debit card attached to that checking account, and it will take a couple of weeks before that comes in the mail.

I lucked-out in one respect.  They are again waiving the joining fee, so I have to get this done in the next two weeks or so, or I miss that damn opportunity again.  The meeting leader also tried to get me to buy a $45.00 member kit with some books and a points calculator.  Yeah, babycakes, like I can barely afford to join your tribe, much less buy your crap.  She told me that the kit is essential to working with the program, but too fucking bad.  I am not buying it.

So, anyway, then, I said my goodbyes and started to leave.  I turned back and asked them if any of the extra stuff was necessary and how much I would be spending there aside from the weekly meeting fees.  They assured me that all I would have to pay is those fees. 

There has to be an easier way of doing all of this, yes?  I think not, actually, but it does give me pause to realize that I am going through all of this to help me become healthier. 

This is the third attempt I have made to join WW.  The first was a wash because there were too many current members who needed help after the meeting period and not everyone was helped, me included, or excluded, I guess.

The second time was a couple of weeks ago and I did not have enough money with me to join because they had placed the joining fee back in there.  Plus, the woman who took care of me was rude.  Still I went back.

Today, I was able to talk to this new woman and she was really as nice and helpful as could be, given that I had three versions of their process to confuse and confound all of us.  I wish that I could remember her name, so that I could leave a compliment somewhere for her.  Ah, someone will help me figure out how to do that.

I know that I am going to have significant problems with their emphasis on portion sizes.  My plan, and it is an excellent one, is to lie about how much I eat until I am able to comply with that aspect. 

I am also going to have difficulty with the dietary balance they require.  I do not eat much fruit, but am willing to do lots of vegetables, which I already eat, so no problems there.  But, they are big on complex carbs and I am just not going to eat as many as they suggest.  I also cannot eat most dairy products, and that was a huge part of the discussion today.  I can eat yogurt a couple of times a week.  I have been trying, or thinking about increasing that to every day and that might help with the whole portion size thing.  If I eat less, my colon is not happy, but if I eat dairy, things move more quickly through my system, although I might get crankier than usual with the cramping.

I am barely keeping my blood sugar at levels that will protect me from losing my sight or any toes, so eating carbs at every meal is just not going to happen.

And, I do not even want to get into the exercise issue.  Inflamed joints and terrible vision make even short walks tricky.  Whatever.  I am going to do my best to do something, just now sure what.  I thought about Curves, because it is the least expensive exercise-related thing around here, but that means practically eliminating any summer travel. 

Yeah, I know, how stoopid that is, that I should just let it go without being so whiny and childish about it, but, gosh, I really need to get out of here once in a while.  I just really and truly need to find some inner balance about all of the life crap.  There are days when I think that I simply cannot go on another moment, but, so far, I am managing to pull myself out of that place.  I read or take a walk around the yard, or call a friend, all of which seem to be working.  So far.

Anyway, that was my day.  I finished it by getting a few groceries and coming home to play mahjong.  Now I am going to bed.

But, first, another GP:

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